Wondering How To Stop Overthinking?
Many people seem to be desperately searching for information on how to stop overthinking.
You’ve probably tried all the usual advice, challenge your thoughts, practice positive affirmations, distract yourself, write in a gratitude journal.
Yet here you are, still stuck in the same mental loops, feeling like you’re going mad.
Here’s what nobody bothers telling you. Overthinking isn’t random. It’s not a personality flaw or something fundamentally wrong with you.
It’s specific patterns your mind runs on repeat, and you can learn to recognise them.
For years, I tried everything to stop overthinking. Absolutely everything. None of it worked because I was still playing by the patterns’ rules, I was still engaging with them, fighting them, trying to change them.
After 28 days in a Thai meditation retreat, I discovered something that changed everything for me. There are specific mental patterns that create overthinking.
Once you see them clearly, you can step outside them instead of being controlled by them.
This post answers the 10 common questions people ask about overthinking.
But instead of giving you the same tired advice that hasn’t worked, I’m showing you the pattern recognition approach that actually can work for you.
Let’s get straight to your questions.
1. Why Am I Always Overthinking?
Here’s the thing, you’re not “always” overthinking. It just feels that way because you’re running specific patterns that kick in automatically.
Think about it like this: Your mind has developed certain habits over the years.
Someone acts a bit off with you?
Boom… the Replay Pattern kicks in and you’re analysing every word of your last conversation.
Got something important coming up?
The Catastrophe Pattern fires up and suddenly you’re imagining every possible disaster.
You’re trying to relax in the evening. The Problem-Solving Pattern decides now’s the perfect time to mentally work through everything that’s bothering you.
These patterns feel constant because they’ve become your default response to certain triggers. But you’re not actually overthinking 24/7, you’re experiencing the same few patterns running on repeat in specific situations.
And here’s why that matters.
You can’t fix “always overthinking” because it’s too vague and overwhelming. But you absolutely can learn to spot when a specific pattern is running and choose to step outside it.
The pattern shows up. You notice it. You don’t engage. Simple as that… though admittedly not always easy.
Learn more about what triggers overthinking.
2. What Is The Root Cause Of Overthinking?
Let’s start with what it’s not. The root cause isn’t childhood trauma or anxiety or perfectionism, though these might be where your specific patterns originated.
The actual root cause is that you’re living with unconscious mental habits that run automatically.
Here’s the reality.
At some point, overthinking served a purpose.
- Maybe analysing everything helped you avoid mistakes.
- Maybe catastrophising felt like you were being prepared.
- Maybe replaying conversations was your mind’s way of trying to “get it right next time.”
But those protective mechanisms became patterns. They’re now running automatically, even when the original situation that created them is long gone.
The threat that made the pattern useful doesn’t exist anymore, but the pattern’s still running like it does.
The root cause of your overthinking today isn’t some deep psychological wound that needs years of therapy to heal. It’s that these patterns have become habits.
Your mind isn’t broken, it’s just running old programmes that are no longer useful.
Understanding this changes everything. You’re not trying to fix a fundamental flaw in yourself.
You’re recognising patterns and choosing different responses. That’s completely doable.
3. How To Train Your Brain To Stop Overthinking
Right, let’s be clear about what doesn’t work.
You can’t train your brain to stop overthinking through sheer willpower or positive thinking. That’s like trying to stop a moving car by standing in front of it, you’re just going to get run over.
What actually works?
Training your brain to recognise patterns instead of getting caught up in them.
Here’s what that looks like in practice. The Replay Pattern starts up (you’re replaying what you said at that meeting last week).
You don’t fight it.
You don’t tell yourself to “stop thinking about it.”
You just notice: “Ah, that’s the Replay Pattern running again.”
Then you ask yourself one simple question: “Can I actually do anything about this right now?”
If the answer’s no, you gently return to whatever you’re actually doing in this moment.
Same with the Catastrophe Pattern. Your mind starts creating disaster scenarios about tomorrow’s presentation.
You recognise it: “There’s the Catastrophe Pattern.”
You ask: “Is this actually happening right now?” Nope. Back to the present.
This isn’t about suppression or pretending the thoughts aren’t there. It’s about seeing them clearly for what they are, patterns, not reality.
And each time you do this, you’re weakening the pattern’s automatic control over you.
The first time, it might take you twenty minutes to notice the pattern’s running.
Then ten minutes.
Then five.
Eventually, you’re spotting it in seconds and stepping outside it before it takes over your whole day.
4. What Are The Signs Of Overthinking?
The signs of overthinking aren’t random symptoms, they’re specific patterns showing up in your daily life. Here are the most common ones you’ll recognise:
You replay conversations long after they’re over. Days, weeks, sometimes years later, you’re still analysing what you said or should have said. That embarrassing thing from three years ago! Still replaying it. That’s the Replay Pattern in action.
You catastrophise about the future. One small problem becomes an entire disaster movie in your mind.
You send an email with a typo and immediately imagine getting fired, losing your house, ending up homeless. That’s the Catastrophe Pattern taking over.
You can’t make simple decisions. Choosing what to have for dinner takes twenty minutes because you’re analysing every possible option and outcome.
That’s the Problem-Solving Pattern running when it’s completely unnecessary.
You’re absolutely knackered but can’t sleep. Your body’s exhausted but your mind won’t shut off. It’s racing through tomorrow’s tasks, replaying today’s conversations, worrying about next week.
That’s multiple patterns competing for attention.
You feel like different people in different situations. Confident at work but insecure at home. Outgoing with some friends, completely withdrawn with others.
That’s the Multiple Selves Pattern, you’re switching between versions of yourself based on who’s around.
You need constant reassurance. Even after someone tells you everything’s fine, you keep questioning it. “Are you sure you’re not angry?” “Did I say something wrong?”
That’s the Catastrophe Pattern mixed with the Replay Pattern, creating a lovely cocktail of doubt.
The signs aren’t random symptoms of being “an overthinker.” They’re specific patterns that you can learn to recognise and step outside of.
Once you know which pattern you’re dealing with, you know exactly how to respond.
5. How To Break The Overthinking Cycle
You can’t break the overthinking cycle by fighting it. Here’s why, when you try to challenge or change your thoughts, you’re still engaging with the pattern.
You’re still playing by its rules. You’re still trapped in the game.
The actual way to break the cycle is recognition without engagement.
Here’s what that looks like in practice. The Replay Pattern starts running (that embarrassing thing you said last week is playing on repeat again). Instead of:
- Fighting it (“Stop thinking about this! Just stop!”)
- Challenging it (“It wasn’t that bad, you’re overreacting”)
- Distracting yourself (“Think about something else, anything else”)
You simply recognise it, “That’s the Replay Pattern running.”
Then you ask yourself: “Am I actually in that moment right now, or am I just thinking about it?”
You’re just thinking about it. So, you return to what’s actually happening in this present moment.
The pattern loses its power when you see it clearly. You’re no longer trapped in the content of the thoughts, obsessing over what you said, how they reacted, what you should have done differently.
You’re observing the pattern itself. “Oh, there’s that pattern again.”
The cycle breaks when you stop feeding it with engagement.
Notice it, name it, return to the present moment.
That’s it.
That’s the whole method.
It’s simple – though not always easy when you’re in the thick of it.
6. What Are The Three Types Of Overthinking?
There aren’t just three types, there are at least seven major patterns I’ve identified. But here are the three most common ones that most people experience:
Past-focused overthinking (The Replay Pattern): Your mind constantly replays past conversations, mistakes, and situations. You’re stuck analysing what happened instead of living in the present. That thing you said five years ago at a party? Still thinking about it. That’s this pattern doing its thing.
Future-focused overthinking (The Catastrophe Pattern and Future Worry Pattern): Your mind creates disaster scenarios about things that haven’t happened yet. You’re suffering through imagined problems instead of responding to actual reality. “What if they think I’m stupid? What if I fail? What if everything goes wrong?” None of its actually happening, but you’re experiencing the stress as if it is.
Problem-solving overthinking (The Problem-Solving Pattern): Your mind believes constant thinking equals productivity. You’re mentally churning through problems even when you can’t do anything about them right now. Lying awake at 3am trying to solve tomorrow’s problems? That’s this pattern convincing you that worry equals preparation.
Many people experience all three types, often switching between them throughout the day.
You might start the morning replaying yesterday (Replay Pattern), spend lunch catastrophising about the future (Catastrophe Pattern), and end the evening mentally problem-solving things you can’t control (Problem-Solving Pattern).
Understanding which pattern you’re caught in helps you recognise it faster and step outside it quicker. Instead of being overwhelmed by “overthinking,” you can pinpoint exactly which pattern is running and choose differently.
7. How To Calm Your Mind From Overthinking
Here’s what won’t calm your overthinking mind. Forcing yourself to relax, trying to clear your thoughts, or doing breathing exercises when you’re already wound up tight as a spring. (Though breathing exercises are brilliant when you’re not already spiralling, that’s a different conversation.)
Want to know what actually works?
Stop trying so hard.
When your mind’s racing with overthinking, it’s never in the present moment. It’s stuck in the past (replaying conversations you can’t change) or worried about the future (catastrophising about things that haven’t happened) or churning through problems you can’t solve right now.
So, here’s what you do.
Just stop.
Just listen to your thoughts in this moment.
How long is a moment?
As long as you bloody well need it to be.
Notice what’s actually around you right now.
- What can you see?
- What can you hear?
- What are you actually doing in this exact second?
Not what you should be doing, not what you were doing, not what you’ll be doing later… what’s happening right now in this moment?
You’re not fighting the thoughts.
You’re not trying to replace them with “better” ones.
You’re not forcing yourself into some zen state of perfect calm.
You’re just coming back to what’s real and who you are being in this very moment.
The thoughts will still be there later if you genuinely need them.
But right now?
You’re just here.
Present.
Aware.
That’s what actually calms an overthinking mind. Being present, not trying to control everything. The control is what keeps the overthinking going.
Letting go of the need to control is what allows it to settle.
8. What’s The Biggest Problem For Overthinkers?
One of the biggest problems for overthinkers isn’t the overthinking itself, it’s not recognising that it’s happening.
You’re so caught up in the content of your thoughts that you don’t see the pattern running underneath.
You genuinely believe you’re problem-solving, or preparing for the future, or learning from past mistakes.
But you’re not. You’re just running patterns on repeat.
The biggest problem is you’re completely identified with the pattern. You think it’s you thinking, when it’s actually just a mental habit running automatically.
There’s no conscious choice happening, the pattern’s in the driver’s seat and you’re not even aware you’re a passenger.
This is why all the traditional advice doesn’t work. “Challenge your negative thoughts” assumes you can see them as thoughts to challenge.
But you can’t, because you think they’re reality. You think they’re you.
Once you can step back and see “Oh, that’s the Replay Pattern running” or “That’s the Catastrophe Pattern doing its thing,” everything changes.
You’re no longer trapped in it because you can see it for what it is… a pattern, not truth.
The problem isn’t overthinking.
The problem is not recognising it as a pattern you can step outside of.
Fix that recognition problem, and the overthinking loses its power over you.
9. What Happens To Your Body When You Overthink Too Much?
Overthinking isn’t just a mental problem. It creates real physical effects in your body. And here’s why. Your body can’t tell the difference between real threats and imagined ones.
When you’re caught in the Catastrophe Pattern, imagining everything that could go wrong at tomorrow’s presentation, your body responds as if that disaster is actually happening right now.
- Stress hormones flood your system.
- Your heart rate increases.
- Your muscles tense up.
- Your breathing gets shallow.
When you’re stuck in the Replay Pattern, constantly replaying that embarrassing moment from last week, your body experiences the shame and embarrassment as if it’s happening in this moment.
It doesn’t know the difference between memory and reality.
The physical effects of chronic overthinking include:
Exhaustion – Mental patterns drain energy even when you’re not physically doing anything. You end the day absolutely knackered despite barely moving from your desk.
Sleep problems – The patterns won’t shut off when you’re trying to rest. Your body’s desperate to sleep but your mind’s racing through tomorrow’s to-do list or replaying today’s conversations.
Tension headaches and muscle pain – Constant mental stress creates physical tension. Your shoulders are up by your ears, your jaw’s clenched, your back’s tight as a drum.
Digestive issues – Stress from overthinking affects your gut health. That constant knot in your stomach? That’s your body responding to mental patterns.
Weakened immune system – Chronic stress from mental patterns suppresses your immune function. You catch every cold going around.
Your body is responding to patterns as if they’re reality. When you learn to recognise patterns and step outside them, your body can finally relax.
The physical symptoms start easing because you’re no longer triggering stress responses all day long.
10. Why Does My Brain Think Things I Don’t Want It To?
This is the question that used to drive me absolutely mad. Why does my brain keep thinking things I don’t want to think?
Why can’t I just control it?
Here’s the truth that changes everything… your brain isn’t actually thinking those things.
Patterns are running automatically, without your conscious permission or control.
Those unwanted thoughts aren’t “you.” They’re mental habits that got created years ago to help you cope with difficult situations.
At some point, the Replay Pattern was genuinely trying to help you learn from mistakes.
The Catastrophe Pattern thought it was preparing you for potential problems.
The Comparison Pattern believed it was motivating you to improve yourself.
But now they’re just running on autopilot, even when you don’t want them to. They’re like background programmes on your computer that you forgot to close, still running, still using resources, still affecting performance.
Here’s the bit that changes everything.
You can’t stop these patterns through willpower.
Telling yourself “Don’t think about that” is completely useless, in fact, it usually makes it worse. (Try not thinking about a pink elephant. See? Doesn’t work.)
But you can learn to recognise when they’re running. And once you see them clearly, you can choose not to engage with them.
The pattern shows up.
You notice it.
You return to what’s actually happening right now.
That’s it.
That’s the whole method.
Your brain will keep running patterns, they’re deeply ingrained habits developed over years. But once you can see them for what they are, they lose their power over you.
You’re no longer controlled by thoughts you don’t want because you recognise them as patterns, not truth. Not reality.
Just old programmes running in the background that you can choose to close down.
Pattern Recognition Changes Everything
These ten questions all point to the same fundamental truth. Overthinking isn’t random chaos happening in your head. It’s specific patterns running on repeat, and you can learn to recognise them.
You can’t stop overthinking through willpower, positive thinking, or challenging every negative thought that pops up.
Those approaches keep you engaged with the pattern, fighting it, which just makes it stronger and more persistent.
The actual solution is recognition. See the pattern clearly, and you can step outside it.
I spent years trying to control my overthinking. Tried every technique, read a ton of books, followed the advice. Nothing worked for the long term until I learned to recognise the patterns running my mind.
Now, when the Replay Pattern starts up, I notice it in about 20 seconds and choose differently.
When the Catastrophe Pattern kicks in, I see it for what it is and return to what’s actually happening right now.
The patterns still show up, they’re habits my mind developed over years, but they don’t control me anymore.
Once you see patterns clearly, they lose their power over you. You’re no longer trapped because you can recognise what’s happening and choose a different response.
Ready to learn about the patterns keeping you stuck?
Download “The Loop Breaker Guide: 15 Mental Patterns That Keep You Stuck (And How to Break Them)” and discover the specific steps to recognise and step outside each pattern.
This isn’t about positive thinking or forcing yourself to change. It’s about seeing clearly what’s actually running your mind. And once you see it, everything changes.